I may be late to the party on this but it comes up each time I watch the video and so I’d rather get it off my chest than leave it bouncing around my skull.

A few months ago I discovered this:

It’s amusing and charming, aside from the trailers for other songs at the end.

It’s based on “If I Were A Boy” by Beyoncé and it’s the video to that which gets to me:

The problem is that I cannot get through it without pausing repeatedly in exasperation. I like the song but it all reminds me of how pathetic I feel her character is in the video. For simplicity’s sake I’m going to refer to “her” and “him” – I don’t know who wrote the song and whether there is even a specific subject.

I’m not surprised that her man would turn off his phone. He’s supposed to be an alpha male – why would he be interested in some being on the receiving end of some needy whining?

This sounds harsh, I know, but ultimately it’s a problem I have with many women I’ve met. Constant insecurity may be good for the economy but it’s hardly a good foundation for an adult relationship.

It took me years to build up and learn to be confident in who I am. Ultimately though I like me and expect a similar attitude from whoever I’m with. We support each other but are capable of existing independently of the relationship.

This notion that she expects her man not to flirt with other people surprises me. I flirt with other people but I’m not shopping around for someone new, the same applies for her. I’ve no fear of being ousted in favour of someone better simply because I know I rock.

I could go on and on but in general it simply comes down to the fact that it’s stupid and sexist. There are some things that are men being lousy people but other things are offensive, sweeping statements. Furthermore, men are men. That isn’t an attempt to excuse bad behaviour, it’s more that the context should be remembered. There are other options for partners (which come with their own set of differences and challenges). Ordering a steak then complaining that it’s not vegetarian-friendly seems a bit silly to me.

I suppose that sort of thing has appeal as broad as its generalisations though. It’s not like women don’t get lots of horrendously sexist stuff thrown their way!

0 responses to "It’s like a bleedin’ cider festival!"

Leave a Reply